Posts Tagged ‘limiting thoughts’

Re-Evaluating

What opportunities will you open up to in 2018?

This past Fall we said goodbye to California and moved to Mexico. Oh, and got married, too. For a person like myself with ADHD, the amount of details was overwhelming. Ordinarily, I would have said there is no way I could manage all the research involved with selling most of our possessions and our house, getting visas, planning a drive, and all the other details.

Yet, I did it.

We had decided to make this move a while ago, and now was the time. I gave up what I thought I was capable of and did what I needed to make the decision a reality.

Mexico is wonderful. But it is very different from California. Plus, we had to discover places to shop, eat, get things fixed. We needed to find doctors, dentists, lawyers, and friends. Think all that was challenging? Really, not so much. I know I am more capable than I thought I was. I can do without some of the things I thought were necessary (like Trader Joe’s), and I can learn just about any new thing with time and practice.

Perhaps you are holding some limiting stories about your capabilities and options based on your past or other people’s opinions.

The new year is a good time to re-evaluate your life. What from 2017 do you want to let go of? What will you develop further?

And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.

– Anaïs Nin

 

– Sydney Metrick

4 Words That Keep You Small

Do any of these phrases sound familiar?

“I can’t find time to…”

“I really should get to bed earlier/exercise more/eat better.”

“I’ll try.”

“I never get anywhere on time.”

Those four words: “can’t,” “should,” “try,” and “never” may be keeping you from the successes you want. Each of these words creates a mental limitation.

  • You can but you don’t or won’t, so you feel bad about yourself.
  • You should… but you’re not, so you feel bad about yourself.
  • You’ll try, but either you haven’t made a commitment or you lack some confidence, and maybe you end up feeling bad about yourself if you don’t manage to fulfill your intention.
  • You never…, so why believe change is possible. Yes, you probably end up feeling bad about yourself.

All of these words make you feel bad about yourself, so stop using them and start being honest with yourself and others.

  • It is OK to say that you are not interested in doing something, or that you need help to accomplish something. There are very few things a person cannot do if they have the interest, tools, and support.
  • “Should” is a matter of other people’s opinion. If those things are in alignment with your perspective, you’ll do them. If not, then they are not of your concern.
  • When you try, you open the door in your brain to fail. Thomas Edison said, “I have not failed. I’ve just found ten thousand ways that won’t work.” You don’t need to try, you just need to find the way that works for you.
  • Just because you never have does not mean that you never will. You could accidentally show up on time – you’ve just debunked your never. The phrase “never say never” is valuable because you really do not know what’s to come.

It is easy to fall into limiting language – it’s all around us. When you catch yourself, stop. Even if you’re in the middle of a sentence. Even if you are only talking or thinking to yourself. Stop, rephrase, move forward.

 

-Sydney Metrick